Hearts Seeing, Eyes Waiting...

Dun Think I can get In le...
Wednesday, March 22, 2006 1:08 PM

Haizz... I have started 2 giv up hope le. Damn lousy week 4 mi.

Last sat, dear dear angry wif mi. Cos i 4get sth i promise. Haizz... Suan le. R we realli drifting apart? I realli hate 2 think abt tt...

Mon, din receive call frm the company i went interview the previous thur. Tt means gone case again. Decided 2 find ciaxian n ask her abt the job she said 2 weeks ago. Pay little n damn inconvinient 4 mi. But i have no choice le. Can't keep on bai chi bai he at home. My $ is oso running out. Haizzz...

Tue, went jogging in the morning. Love chinese garden early in the morning. All the nature n quietness. No 1 nagging, no stress. C tortises sun tanning, birds flying around, fishes swimming, wind blowing. Realli hope time will jus stop there...

Back 2 reality, sent my resume 2 ciaxian's company, n got her sms in the afternoon asking mi to report work on mon. Tt's fast. But i noe they need ppl la.

Today?
Lazy. Din go jog. Wake up den check result. Got a B+ for my internship. I'm satisfied wif tt cos i noe my company ppl dun realli think i do things veri well. Haiz... CCA, 4 bonus pt. But i think my no. of pts can get 2 4 bonus pt le. Nvm... Awarded a diploma... Graduate le... But i dun feel any happiness at all...

Back 2 my all time probz...
Is looking small always a sin? I hate it when ppl sae i look small n immature. No matter how i dress, how i act, NO USE!!! Ppl always sae: "dun take a book by it cover", but they are always doing tt themselves!! I start 2 loss all my confidence... No matter how much things i've done, no 1 will ever notice mi. No 1 will aknowledge mi...

All those interviewers... Always gimme those doubtful eyes. So many times. Since sec 2 when i went 2 find jobs 4 the 1st time. I am POOR. I need $$. I wan 2 work hard. But when ppl dun wan 2 giv u any job, how am I gg 2 WORK HARD!!

Until now, among so many jobs i've work, those i get in 1 is always those w/o having formal interview or they desperately need ppl 1. Haizz... Still got 1 tell mi tt i look immature in the face n ask mi 2 get out... GND LA THESE PPL!!!

I am born like this ok? Wat u all wan mi 2 do? I no $ 2 go buy all the "pu ping" to drink oso. I am CHEAP, UGLY N WEAK OK!!! HAPPY?!!

WATEVER!! Bye bloggy... Thanx 4 letting mi "fa xie"...

# I'm jus a little Girl who need lots of Luv -

I c No fuTuRE!!
Sunday, March 12, 2006 6:47 PM

Zzz... Still haven found job. Argh~

Last week, mon n tue rot at home. Wed, go sch 4 co prac. Ran around the sch. Go SAA 3 times. Dazhu was cancelled cos tot too little ppl. But duno y after 7pm, every1 started cuming in. -.- Den tok tok n go home. Zzz...

Thur, go sch open door for delivery of cabinets. Go hand in sch fees oso. Stupid SP finance dept go fine mi. Its them hu din notify that they r gg 2 deduct payment from my account den sae i overdue. GND la... Den go SMU hand application fee. Tt stupid indian security lady, gimme attitude. Idiots... Suddenly bcos of her, i dun feel like gg SMU le. Tt sch looks too cold 2 mi. Concrete n metal everywhere. So dull n not welcoming. Haizzz... Den go bugis shopping alone. Bought a ear stud n a necklace. Maybe i'm trying 2 fa xie bah.

Fri, Early morning go tampines c my job agent, hav lunch alone at TM, den go douby guat 4 interview. Jus some temporary job. Nth much. Den go home after tt. Slp all the way on those rides in mrt. -.- Den evening go out again 4 a gathering for all hangten's colleagues n ex-colleagues. Less den 20 ppl turn up. Of all of them, i onli noe 6ppl. Tok 2 them n eat. Din eat much, n go home quite early la. Too tired. Cos hav been running around whole day.

Sat, rot in the morning. Den afternoon, go ikea wif dear. Heez... Maybe tt's the most happy thing out of my tis whole week bah. I so bored n tired! Ikea got sale. So crowded. I onli bought an alarm clock. Tot its 90cents but end up its $1.80. Nvm, still veri cheap. So much things tt i hope i can place in my future home. Hahaha... Gonna decorate my own house nice nice next time. :D

Den we go anchor pt. Keep walking around giodarno. I'm so tempted so buy a white short n a lime green top. Hahaha... But will spend a lot of $. So jus c onli. Den nth there so we walk 2 queensway shopping centre. Eat the katong laksa there. Haha... Super nice. Not spicy at all 1. Mus add more of their chilli. But eat there quite stress. Cos many ppl staring n waiting 4 seats. :P Somemore i eat so slow. Hahaha... Den drink red milk bubble tea. :D

After eating den we go shop around. Wan 2 buy a shirt 4 dear, but he keep saying all not nice. -.- Nvm... In the end its i spend $ again. 3 items 4 $10. Bought 2 necklaces n a belt. :D I think i getting siao le. Bought 3 necklaces in 2 days. Haizz... Den we walk back 2 queenstown mrt n go home.

Today, rotting again. Initially wan 2 go open house 1. But can't find any1 2 go wif mi, so din go. Watch tv, read comic, watch anime, eat, slp... Haizzz... I hate tt. I'm jus plain lazy. I realli duno wat i wan 2 do. Shall go library tml bah. Read up on thing tt i realli wan 2 do.

Zzz... Wat will happen 2 mi? I realli can't c my future...

# I'm jus a little Girl who need lots of Luv -

Graduate le!!
Tuesday, March 07, 2006 3:13 PM

Finally... Poly days are over.... Haizz... No more of slacking n playing around le. Feel so stress now. Dun wan 2 grow up.

Wat will happen 2 mi next? I realli hav no idea yet. Apply 4 uni le. Will i get in?

Finding jobs now. Will any1 wan mi? Will i b of any use?

Haizz... I realli duno. Seems like I'm jus average in everything. I dun excel in anything. I can c my talent, or maybe i hav no talent or any other strengths at all.

Watever i wan 2 study, I can't. No $. No talents. I can be relate to rubbish le. Lazy somemore. Haizz... Throw mi away bah...

# I'm jus a little Girl who need lots of Luv -